I had an interesting experience a couple of years ago at a restaurant. Our waitperson had been very friendly and expressed interest in my book, that happened to be sitting on the table. I could tell he had been thinking about this question for a while when he came over to the table and asked me “what do you think is the secret of happiness?” Maybe he thought someone who wrote a book would know the answer to that question even though my book was about management!
I never had a philosophical discussion in these circumstances before so his question surprised me and got me thinking the rest of the day. What did I think was the secret of happiness? Why are some people happy and others unhappy?
I put the question “what do you think is the secret to happiness?” on a Facebook post and received a variety of responses such as: friends and family, health, winning the lottery, knowing our purpose and value in life, belief in God, seeing the glass as half full, philanthropy, and one of my favorites “happiness is a choice.”
After reviewing everyone’s opinion, several discussions with friends, and self-reflection, I created the following Recipe for Happiness which has five ingredients:
- Purpose: I believe that people need purpose in life. Purpose can vary from raising a family, having a stimulating job, perfecting a skill, learning something new, volunteering for a worthwhile cause, etc. When you can wake up each morning knowing your purpose for that day, you are happier.
- Optimism: Optimistic people believe that negative events are temporary. They can see past their current state to a future that seems brighter. They have hope that things will change for the better and that hope drives them to work towards being happier.
- Gratitude: There are some people who spend their time focusing on what they do not or cannot have. People who can express gratitude for the things and people they have in their lives now are happier. I like to fall asleep at night thinking about five “gratitude’s” for that day.
- Altruism: When you use your skills, talents, or time to helping others in need, you tend to forget about your own problems. According to The Healing Power of Doing Good (Luks and Payne) altruism can have powerful health and healing benefits including: A sense of well-being, exhilaration and euphoria, a more positive and happier outlook on life, decreased feeling of helplessness, loneliness and depression
- Relationships: Having close friends/family to share the joys and sadness in our life makes us feel connected and supported. Close relationships make us feel accepted for who we are when people care enough to encourage our growth and well-being. Encouraging our friends and family to grow as well as celebrating their success, contributes to our happiness.
How would you customize this recipe with your favorite ingredients?
We would enjoy partnering with you in 2023 to accomplish your training goals. Go to http://managementskillsinc.com for workshop ideas and sample profiles and videos. For more information contact Deborah.Avrin@ManagementSkillsInc.com.
Best wishes for a safe and happy holiday season!